02.04.2007 - 02.04.2007 32 °C
this is my journal entry from last night...
Happy April fools day...hmmm, what a great way to start. Its 815 on the night of april fools day and i just realized it was april fools day.
When you travel, among a zillion things gained, you lose a sense of community. You lose your place of belonging, at the very core you lose value. Noone i see from day to day knows what i am good at and what makes me a valuable member of society and i dont know it of them in return. Noone knows i can draw any number of things in the head of a guiness when i pour one..a skill ive worked hard at. Noone knows that i still suck my tongue at the ripe age of 26. Noone knows i can take a decent photograph. Noone knows i can text faster than almost anyone i know. Noone knows im still a virgin dying to fall in love with someone who will fight for me so i can deservingly give it away. Noone knows im the baby of 4 of the coolest kids on the block. Noone even knows i am in fact a Westaway, something the we have taken extremely seriously and created a small religion around--dont fuck with the westaways! Noone knows i want to live in India someday but dont have a clue what else i want to do with my life. Noone knows i am a part of a community of believers in christ more passionate about discovering what it looks like to love people the way jesus did, in a setting of new york city, than anyone ive ever met. Noone knows i once dated a guy with the same first and last inital as me, and a strikingly similar last name. Noone knows i love sleeping and i love being naked, but rarely mix the two. Noone knows i used to be a vegetarian, but cant go back because i love a mean cheeseburger(and apparently according to my roommate, fried chicken--her family even asks me about it). Noone knows i take friendship very seriously and am uncommonly intense about it, and would do anything in the world for the ones i love. Noone knows i look up to my siblings with a reverence that brings tears to my eyes just thinking about. Noone knows i would love to write a book but am not refined enough to do so. Noone even knows i am an american, and if my life depended on it--not too uncommon here in africa--i wouldnt be able to prove it. I share all this random info because i know all of you know it..or some of it and know which of you will know the funny details and that makes me smile..and mostly, it reminds me i belong.
My identity, travelling companion and joy of travelling is gone right now and even if i had to i couldnt leave this country. Last night i finished the one 400 page book i brought to DAR and the book store was closed today. I just realized when passing a church that it was sunday..and palm sunday..after seeing the sanctuary covered in palms. My hostel has been out of water for over a day and im covered in sludgy sweat. i did get a bucket to make a bucket bath, which was surprisingly refreshing! My bank has yet to get back to me to determine whether or not my situation is a once in a lifetime emergency case...being in tanzania without a debit or credit card..where they would dhl me a new one. After 30 minutes and 20 bucks on the phone with them i was cut off and have resorted to emails with them instead..the last of which they asked for my address...ps, there arent addresses so much in africa. I have travelled solo before for a month in india and had the time of my life..but this time it is not so. I think i am a more social person than i was last time around--something i attribute to one of my best friends and former roommates, labri. I love meeting new people and connecting with them in conversation..sharing stories and listening to life as they have seen it.
I love this continent and i have loved listening to the stories of those actually interested in talking with me, not just taking from me. i already know i want to come back and i am eagerly awaiting kyles return so we can carry on with the rest of the trip. I know there are lots of memories yet to be had and i am anxious to get these 5 or so days behind me and to see all that there is left to see on our route..zanzibar..then crossing the border into mozambique...as lonely planet puts it..one of the most adventurous border crossings in africa..using busses, boats or canoes, a pickup truck...?..and more buses...then making our way south as fast as possible to jo'Burg to rent a car and spend the last 2 weeks crusing around seeing all we can.
i love you guys and i love doing life with you.